Monday, October 27, 2008

Keep Your Clothes On, Plenty of Them

"You don't want an average, sensible, down-to-earth life any more than I do. You want something remarkable, vivacious, occasionally wicked. You want sometimes to be a temptress, a superior lady with her hair piled up, sometimes a hard-working woman of the world"

I recently posted about Jane Seymour's Guide to Romantic Living. A bunch of you wrote in, delighted by Jane's poses, gowns, and chutzpah. I'm not sure I was fair to Ms. Seymour; I implied the book was more a smug catalog of luxury, than an actual guide to romance. But there really are some tips in there, and I thought we'd go over them together today. After all, Jane is correct. I do indeed want something remarkable, vivacious, and occasionally wicked. Don't you? Come to think of it, that 's a pretty accurate description of Jane's above look. Please click to enlarge. Did you? Oh, good. Now let's get to it.

Jane Seymour's Top Three Tips on Dressing to Seduce:

1. "Women have become too lacking in mystery. Now is the time for romance and and its companion, mystery, to return to our lives. Try veils, hats, antique jewelry, lockets. Don't reveal too easily who is in the locket; just stare moodily into the distance and smile a tender tragic smile. Life is for fun, danger, romance: live it. Don't take your clothes off hours after meeting some man: keep them on, plenty of them, keep him guessing, keep him entranced."

No one needs to know that inside the locket is a charming snapshot of my clinically obese cat with the one rakishly clouded eye. Oh, like you have something better in your locket. Next up, in case you thought that Jane got wrapped in the plumage and hides of pheasant, beaver, peacock and perhaps, R.O.U.S., just to amuse herself, allow her to set you straight. She did it for you, for everyone:

2. "Remind everyone of what is good in life, wear what is good, wear a fresh flower instead of a brooch, silk stockings on your legs, lace in your hair. Be close to nature, textiles, the past, even while you are arranging multi-million dollar deals-- or perhaps especially then."

The concept here of dressing for others, to entertain or inspire, is one I've been meaning to bring up here. In New York City, this is a very real and palpable thing. We're all supposed to do our part creating the scenery. By no means am I always up for it, but when I'm not, I'm well-aware that I'm slacking.

The third tip is a well-known classic that I completely endorse, and that Jane credits for launching her career. Jane figured out this little trick right before she met with a producer, in hopes of becoming the next Bond girl.

3. "I took off my hat, quite nervously, and my hair all came tumbling down over my shoulders.
He was entranced, amazed, delighted...
I was trying, I suppose, to show him what I looked like without hair, with a 'clean' face, and with long hair. And I didn't want to put my hair up in his office and then take it down...
That maneuver alone is something anyone with long hair should occasionally delight men with. There is nothing more ravishing than a stern creature with hair up in a bun becoming, in just a moment, someone sensual and indulgently feminine.
How boring life will be if women continue to be severe on themselves, to stride up and down corridors like men, never to stoop to such tricks as my hair trick."

And... success!